Paris Hilton Equals Perfect Wife, Says Obviously Android Boyfriend
May 1st, 2008 admin Posted in News |
The great thing about love is that there really is someone for everyone.
Just look at Sloth and Chunk from The Goonies. Sloth, a malformed man-beast with a saliva control problem and a wonky eye, loved Chunk even though he was an unfortunate-looking kid who got left behind like the whiny dead weight he was.
The same is true for Paris Hilton and her boyfriend Benji Madden. Really the exact same, actually. This modern day Sloth and Chunk are so in love that Benji has slipped nicely into delirium and is blabbering to anyone that’ll listen about how Paris is perfect wife material. See? Just like Sloth and Chunk. Only more repellent.
Paris Hilton really does no how to rope in the winners, doesn’t she? She made a highly publicized naughty home video with Rick Salomon, then there was Nick Carter who may or may not have knocked her around a bit, and even a guy with whom she shared a first name and probably a variety of communicable diseases, just to name a few. Throw in there some undie-flashing and urinating in moving vehicles, and you’ve got quite a gal, there.
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